(Nov. 8, 2013) Every day I think of our family's story and the loss of my brother due to his lack of treatment for his mental illness.
I lost a brother who for over 40 years was like any other member of our family. He was a college graduate, business owner and father who enjoyed spending time with his family. He was a regular guy.
Until he wasn’t.
Ten years ago he started getting off track and began to say things I had never heard him utter before. He was someone I had known my entire life and suddenly he started taking on a new persona. For over a year there were gradual changes and then a spiral out of control.
I am a nurse, and I had absolutely no idea what mental illness truly encompassed until we were faced with his ultimate diagnosis of bipolar disorder. For my brother it was terminal.
His last manic period began when he was in Costa Rica in the spring of 2012. Somehow we were able to get Brad hospitalized in Costa Rica. Even being in another country this was easier than at any time back in the states.
Unfortunately, once he was deported back to the United States all medical care immediately ceased. His illness became worse and his path took him to jail. This was not the first time jail became his only way of being locked up and kept from making more acts of poor judgment.
He was in and out of jail and in and out of mental institutions where he was usually only kept for three days. The social workers never listened, meanwhile his symptoms and his behavior worsened. All the while we stood by helpless.
I constantly discussed with my brother, what goes up, must come down. And with time, we all realized the further up, the further down. He came down very fast and hard in the end. When he was discharged from the hospital, the doctors told him, “There is nothing more we can do for you here that you can’t do at home.” But he can commit suicide at home.
Faced with moving into a group home, my brother who had run his own business couldn't face the humiliation and he committed suicide the night before being placed.
Do I think that laws need to be changed? For the severely mentally ill, for those loved ones that have lost the ability to make proper decisions, have had multiple hospitalizations with their illness, absolutely someone needs to be their advocate.
For those of us who know the person best, who can be their ally, we are relegated to a back seat position and absolutely no ability to help during times of crisis.
While my brother had lost many things along the path of his illness, treatment would have helped him regain some of his dignity. There could have been a place for him in society, rather than a burden to it.
Untreated severe mental illness will never have a positive outcome, both for the stability of the illness, and ultimately for the life of the person suffering.
Please, we need to change the laws. We need to change the perception of these illnesses. Without this, there will continue to be stories like my brother's, and families like mine will continue to mourn their loss.
Denise Schmitt
Wisconsin
Schmitt's brother lived in Florida
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